Understanding Children’s Best Interests in Divorce

Divorce can be complex – Keep it simple and focused on the child

Marriages can be complex as there are various components that go into it. The relationship itself has its own history, the partners have their own personalities, together with all external stresses and pressures that life throws at the couple. Should a marital relationship come to an end, and the parties decide to get a divorce, then the divorce is muddied with the emotions that go with all the above.

I have seen time and time again how children are used as a pawn in the process. Whether it is having one parent demanding more access to the child so that their maintenance contributions are reduced or having one parent moving the child to another city so as to make access for the other parent more difficult. It is sad how often we as attorneys face these types of scenarios and even more tragic how the children are made the victims in a divorce.

The emotions that come with the divorce are the reason that parents sometimes do not act in the best interest of their child. That is when we as attorneys intervene and utilise the services of a family advocate, psychologist, and counsellor to assist.

The saying goes “it takes a team to build a village” and this is exactly the case when it comes to a divorce. The family advocate, psychologist and or counsellor are imperative to assess the child’s emotional and psychological needs. This is done through various methods of counselling – be it therapy, consultations with the child and or parents or relying on the vast experience that comes with holding such a position.

The family advocate, psychologist and or counsellor then make their recommendations to the court, which the attorneys for the parents can either accept, or challenge. Whilst our duty lies with our client, we have a greater onus to ensure that we are acting in the best interest of the child. The suggestions and challenges are then placed before the magistrate or judge who then either makes the recommendation an order of court or refers the matter for further investigation.

In the event of a nasty divorce, it is the attorneys, magistrates, judges, family advocates, psychologists and counsellors who ensure the child’s interest are of paramount importance.

For more information: Tania Abbotts / TAbbotts@hammondpole.co.za